Yesterday I was communicating to a person concerning my possible work for a certain organization. The discussion was going quite ok, although some points bothered me a little.
But when I woke up in the night, I suddenly realized – I just don’t want to do this exact job. I mean it’s fine, quite ok, close to what I did before maybe too simple comparing to what I had achieved. But that’s not the point.
I was thinking about the company who gives this job – they are doing what they are doing for some reasons. They find this useful, maybe the impact that their activity brings is crucial or they just earn money as they can and like it. In any case they do it for some purpose. They make a difference.
But why was I going to fit in this? What kind of difference am I supposed to make if I personally don’t find anything special for me in this job: it does not feel like a big challenge, it’s unlikely that I will learn something new and I am not going to earn money there (must admit I really like earning money and investing it for doing something good. That’s one of my peculiarities.). So why do I want to do this? Actually I do not. It does not feel good for me. Starting to invest my time and my efforts in this makes totally no sense for me.
If I do this because it’s quite a good start for an immigrant, right way to launch my future career here or the normal 1st job at a new place, that will be a big mistake. That feels in the same way as to marry a guy who is fine, quite ok, maybe nice and has a good potential but whom I don’t like, don’t love! The same bullshit.
I want to do the things that I like doing. I want to be satisfied with the results of my activity and achieve something. And it must bring me pleasure. This point is critical: this job must bring me good emotions, satisfaction, motivation and PLEASURE. That’s what makes a difference!